I want to take a moment to talk about this little girl. She is literally the making of me. The journey from conception to present day, not one moment I can describe as easy.
When the creator blessed me with her, it was a signal that it was time for me to grow in ways that I didn’t know I needed to and in ways that I still to this day know how to….
When I look at her, the emotions just overflow. 13, living in a society that’s so contradictory to how she feels and what I’m trying to enable and encourage in her. I want so much for her, I want her to love herself as much as I love her.
I want to protect her at every opportunity, I want to be the voice in her ear when anxiety is telling her it’s not possible. I want to be the example of confidence and what maintaining standards looks like. I want to be the one she runs to when she needs reassurance. I want to be all these things, until she’s ready and able to do it for herself, and everyday is a challenge to quip her with all these things, cause she thinks I’m being hard and unfair – some of the time I probably am. I’m working on my approach…..
I would love to say I’m the perfect parent, but I’m not, I’m only as good as I can be on each day, but my love for my children is something that i cannot explain or question. I’ve said it before “I just want to get it right, and when I don’t I want to be quick to learn”.
I come from a long line of strong, feisty, independent, headstrong women (me included) and I just took for granted that any girl I had would be that by default. Life happens, and sometimes it happens so much earlier than what we imagined or had planned. She is like me in many ways, but for the most part completely different. The creator did that for a reason.
At times, it’s just WHOA! but there’s so much for us to learn from each other. She’s teaching me patience, she forces me to find new approaches, she gives me opportunity to analyse the unrecognised trauma from my childhood and when we’re not at loggerheads, I look at her and I know that I’m doing a great job.
Ash, my sweet girl, my miracle baby, my practice run. My maker, my breaker and reason to grow. I want you to know that I love you. I’m proud of you beyond words, as you enter teendom, I want you to never forget that every situation you find yourself in, is an opportunity to learn and an opportunity to grow. Love yourself; fully and wholly, all those flaws you find are what makes you perfectly you.
Remember love wins ALWAYS, and teamwork makes the dream work ♥️
Love mum xx
I am DSY 